If you have never read “The Alchemist” by Paulo Coelho, I highly recommend it. It will surely awaken the dreamer within you.
I am a very realistic and grounded person that leaves little time or room for dreaming and imagination, because it only has led me to feel uneasy. Lately, I am completely unable to keep focus on a single topic for too long, before my thoughts run off to yet another idea. It’s like my mind wants to dump out every wild idea at the same time, which is why I chose to take a break from writing. Once I start a task, I need to finish it, but I have successfully managed to start 3 books and finish none.
I find myself dreaming more than anything and trying to convince my heart to be content with what’s right in front of me rather than longing for more. I am so thankful for where I am in life, but if I have to spend another weekend sitting on my sofa feeling trapped, I may just lose it. If I choose to go out and have some type of adventure, it feels forbidden. I even feel terrible admitting that I want more for my weekends than watching movies all night. Like clockwork, I am out cold every night no later than 8:30pm. It isn’t out of exhaustion, but of pure boredom with what my life has become.
My heart desires adventure. My heart desires something new. My heart desires to be outside of the walls of my house. Even if I was writing this post from the seat of my car or laying out on the grass with good company, my heart would be content. Here I am at 6:30pm feeling so anxious I wish I could escape my own skin, because yet another night I am trapped within these four walls and my heart just isn’t here.
I am sure some of you will read this and say, “Well just get in your car and go.” That’s just not an option in this house, not tonight at least. For those with some faith, say a prayer for me or send some positive thoughts my way.
It’s just one of those nights…